Dieting

So I started a new diet. I hate dieting, but I hate being over weight more. I have done almost everything out there except for surgery, and nothing seems to work. I did Jenny Craig for about 3 months, but found that I was always hungry, and it was really too expensive. I have worked out here and there and found little to no success losing weight. Don't get me wrong, working out made me feel better, but it was really hard to work out and not really see any results as far as losing any weight. I tried Weight Watchers with Spencer and had little success, but while I was losing maybe a pound a week, he was losing 5.
After about 3 months of dieting, I had lost 8 while he had lost 22. Then for Christmas one year, Spencer gave me 12 sessions with a personal trainer for a present. Believe it or not, I was extremely happy to receive such a gift. I was put on a strict 1200 calorie diet, and worked out 2 hours a day 5-6 days a week for a whole 3 months. And in those 3 months I lost 1 pound! Yes, you read correctly, 1 pound! Again I felt discouraged. But, I didn't give up. I tried another new diet. This time it was L.A. weight loss. My mother-in-law did it, and had great success. I for sure thought that this would finally work. I tried it for 3 months and I didn't even lose a pound. Talk about taking a razor to my wrists. OK, I would never do that, but needless to say I cried alot. I went to my Dr. and asked if there was some drug I could take, to make me less hungry. She politely said in a round about way that I need to stop being lazy, and even though I was mildly obese, to get off my fat a** and work out and follow a strict diet. UUGGGHHHH!!! Was she not listening to me when I told her in detail that I had been on a strict diet and was working out daily. Anyway, she made an appointment for me to get some blood work done, to make sure I didn't have a thyroid problem. So I'm like "YAY", maybe that's my problem. But, no it wasn't. My test results came back normal. So, I gave up. What was the point of eating chalk and working out all the time and not seeing any results? I had missed my double chocolate cake with milk chocolate frosting. Not to mention, brownies, bagels with cream cheese, $200 dollar cookies, french fries, blueberry muffins, and diet Pepsi.
So I made up my mind that my body liked to be FAT! And that I was going to have to go through this life PLUMP!( to say the least) I was never going to be able to go shopping and look in the mirror and be happy to see my "mildly obese" self looking back at me. So I started my new diet. It was "eat whatever I want" diet. My mind was made up. I was just going to have to live with what I looked like and be happy. So I did. And it was fun while it lasted, and then one day, while on vacation, my sister-in-law mentioned this new diet her friend was doing. She had lost 60 pounds in 4 months. And you didn't have to work out! So I said "sign me up!" OK,I didn't sign up right then and there, I did some research,and found that the diet could actually work. Or maybe I just hoped it would because I had tried so many other things. So for our 14th anniversary, Spencer surprised me with the diet program. I was a little scared and hesitant to try it, because, this diet is like no other diet I have ever been on. And you have to give yourself a shot 6 days out of the week. But I figured I tried everything else already, what would it hurt to try this one. I've been on it for 6 days now and have lost 6 POUNDS!!!!! I can't hardly believe it! I have worked out and dieted and not lost nearly as much as I have on this diet.

So, the reason for this post, is to keep myself accountable for staying on this diet and if I know that other people know about my diet program, they could keep me on track. In the past I have done diets and worked out and not told anyone (except for Spencer) because I didn't want to feel like a failure. And I didn't want people to say that I couldn't finish what I started. So if you see me diving for a Snickers bar at Rosaures, tackle me down and slap be back to reality.

(FYI Before and after pictures will be posted after the after pictures are ready.) So stay tuned.

And I want to give a little shout out to my hubby, for loving me just the way I am. Unconditionally fat or skinny. Always telling me that I'm sexy and beautiful, lying to me when I ask him if I look fat, and giving me encouragement when I need it. Thanks Babe! I love you!

9/11

It has been 8 years since the September 11 attacks, and I can clearly remember where I was, and what I was doing. There are moments in my life when confronted about,I have no idea what happened. I draw a blank. Spencer will ask me all the time of things we have done or if I remember this or that. Again I draw a BLANK.
But I could tell you everything about that day. How I woke up in the early morning, with a daily ritual of turning on the t.v. and watching Good Morning America. Brianna was only 3 and Kaden was 2. They were busy playing with their toys in their room. I remember sitting in my bed under the covers. It was gloomy outside,and a little chilly, unusual for San Diego. On the t.v. they were talking about the twin towers and how a plane had just crashed into the first tower. I was shocked to say the least. I was mesmerized and couldn't believe what I was hearing and witnessing. Then out of nowhere a second plane came flying in and strikes the second tower. I felt my heart pounding out of my chest and I was paralyzed. Then I started to cry.

I felt extreme saddness for all those who lost their lives. The images of people jumping to their death, the smoke bellowing from the windows, people running from the site, and people running to the site.

I called Spencer and told him what had happened. We were both in shock.

Eight years later and I still have to choke down tears. May we always remember the sacrifices that were made to save lives on that day. And the sacrifices that have been made since keeping us save. We are so grateful to be living in a country where we are still free and grateful to those who keep us free.